.... So there I sat, late,
in the car in front of the house early on a hazy summer morning
pre-occupied with the mental calisthenics required to orchestrate a
perfect meeting. A meeting that in some not so small way would
determine my near term future ability to support my kids. There I sat....
waiting. Waiting for my daughter who had a summer vacation day ahead of
her and needed a ride to the pool and SHE was running late which was the
much bigger crisis in the family. I sat there tapping the steering
wheel while listening to soft music that provided me tranquility and
cleared my thoughts.
Out of the door she
sprang and hopped into the car.
As she leaned in toward
me I responded as if attracted magnetically by the pull of a father's
love for his daughter... I leaned in to gather my obligatory peck on the
check all the while reminded that this ritualistic peck is the mere
remnant of what just a few short years ago was a full fledged,
uninhibited, even sloppy, kiss. At the very last moment just as I was
to receive my peck, my daughter's attention veered to the right as she
reached forward and changed the station on the radio.
'Dad...' she said as I
looked onward with a confused and hurt expression frozen on my face, '...
let's go. I'm late!'
She then put the
headphones of her iPod in her ears and sat back, no leaned back (as they
say) and started to sing along with the music; 'roll with it' I believe
is the term. And roll with it she did... she sang loudly and badly. The
Apple indeed does not fall far from the tree.
At one point she hit a
particularly bad note and I thought to myself... when and how did this
happen? How did I end up driving places I don't want to go; listening
to music I don't enjoy; spending money and time I don't have on things I
don't value; and talking only to myself?
When and how did this
happen? When did the inmates start running the asylum? When did the
tail start wagging the dog? When and how did I end up standing at the
time-clock at shift change thanking my co-workers for the most minimal
and menial of tasks for which they are paid: for simply showing up at
work?
But remember, as I
advised in last month's newsletter, 'before you criticize the younger
generation (employees) just remember who raised (trained) them.' My
generation Y co-workers (1978 - 1985) and Millenials (1981 - 1999) are
only doing what the Boomers (1946 - 1964) and Xers (1965 - 1980) trained
them to do. So why the conflict when everyone is acting in exactly the
way he or she would be expected to act?
The real reason is work
is different than life and goals must be achieved, deadlines met,
expectations exceeded, or we all fail in business. Well, first of all,
they (the Y's and Millenials) don't know that YET because they have not
YET been trained. It is the job of the Boomers and Xers to accept these
behaviors rather than criticize them and focus on the objectives that
are needed. These younger generations like to win and like to get
positive feedback. Explaining the goals (in great detail sometimes and
in small pieces along the way) rather than critiquing behavior is the
path forward. But let's look at why we are here in the first place...
As kids the Y's and
Millenials were treated to the co-dependant extremes that guilt-driven
Boomer and Xer parents lavished upon them. In the busy work-a-day world
of double incomes and an inflationary cost of living the Boomer and Xer
parents opted to trade money for time. If they didn't have time,
they could spend money and
purchase material possessions and then, when this didn't satisfy the
pangs of parental nurturing these same parents could respond with an excessive
commitment of time out of proportion to the level of achievement; that
is, so long as the time 'commitment' is constrained by a well defined
start and stop time well in advance. Why do you think we have gotten so
out of balance with 'official' celebrations?
Children today enjoy a graduation after pre-school, after kindergarten,
grade school, and middle school and then high school; in sports we cheer
their every achievement and have them run under the 'London bridges
style' tunnel chute of congratulations when all your nine year old did
was beat some other nine year old in a game of soccer. Boy, I would say
the good old 'potty dance' certainly has grown up. By the time this
generation entered the work force they were trained to receive constant
and ONLY POSITIVE feedback; thus, you stand at the time clock thanking
them for arriving JUST A FEW minutes late.
Remember, this does not
mean they are lacking in work ethic. They are actually doing exactly
what they were trained to do and just like on the Soccer field; they
will perform so long as you sing and dance and have something positive
to say. If all else fails... McDonald's on the way home will do.
'Before you criticize,
remember who trained them.'
